The Caroline Bingley Diaries - Part Six

[the_shrubbery]

March 2nd:

At Darcy House again to thank D for books & tell him off for telling me about Van Swanck. D thinks the abbess is the one behind the kidnapping but am sure he is wrong; must be the butler surely for he was the only one who knew Athalia was sleeping in the tower. Cannot wait for fourth volume to come out.

D says he does not believe in common European/Indian-language theory but then the PG came & supported my arguments & am sure we beat D. Had tea with D & G & the PG & was surprisingly much fun even when G asked me to recite Unfortunate Demise of Mr Bunny again. Cupcakes really exquisite & also housekeeper had tried out new recipe with spices & raisins. PG kept chuckling to himself when heavenly cupcakes were served but just ignored him. Arranged with G to see exhibition day after tomorrow but not sure which of her guardians will come with us.

March 3rd:

French really makes so much more sense now that I know about similarities to English language. Think made good progress with French lessons over last few days.

Spent half the morning learning French then started second book D had given me.

Had half hoped L might come over to talk but nobody came all day. Charles still absent although was apparently home some time during the morning but when asked taciturn housekeeper about it, got only new curl of hair of unknown origin. Really cannot locate hair box.

March 4th:

Went for first fitting with Mrs Duckie today before met up with G at exhibition. Mrs Duckie convinced that Lord Paddenstool & the butler are the same person but do not think that can be because Athalia conversed with Lord Paddenstool at the ball where Lord Burkham was killed in the duel.

March 6th:

Stayed in today. Meant to read but then the PG visited, alone, strangely enough. Told him was convinced Athalia’s father must be still alive but PG thinks first chapter tells us differently. We could not agree what Athalia’s exact relation to Sir Vincent was so we drew up a diagram. Had to chuckle at the PG’s poor drawing skills. Really fun half-hour but felt strangely restless afterwards.

March 7th:

Did not feel v. festive in spite of it being my birthday probably because C still behaving oddly & L seemed to have forgotten completely. Had long letter from uncle Tiberius saying that he felt it was his duty as my guardian to give me a bit of advice on my 20th birthday & then followed the usual long sermon on female obedience & a guinea under the seal. Auntie Margaret sent a letter asking how my husband was faring & if she might receive cheerful news, as she put it, any time soon. Think she must have confused me with L again.

Invited G & her companion to take tea with me & she gave me a pair of v. nice gloves, much better present than letters. Abigail gave me nice little shawl to go with new frocks. Really thoughtful of her.

March 8th:

Had note from L today asking to see me the day after tomorrow. Cannot imagine what she wants especially seeing as she forgot my birthday but she wrote as cordially as she used to so will agree to see her. Went to visit G afterwards but she was out. Darcy was in though and we spent good time eating cupcakes and dissecting Sir Vincent’s intentions. He has it all wrong.

March 11th:

Saw L yesterday. L very cheerful, apologised for recent bad behaviour & forgetting my birthday. Gave me very pretty hat (colour slightly garish but will do well enough with white frock) & explained she had stressful time in marriage. Told her I would support her should it come to a separation but she claims all good now. L invited me to come with them to Somerset in two weeks. She insisted most ardently & I could not refuse; hope everything will be as it used to be. Realised should probably go shopping for trip; host, after all, a baronet and would not wish to look dowdy. Somehow though ended up in bookshop.

Pre-ordered next volume of The Woes of the Chaste Orphan Athalia & ran into the PG in the bookshop. Thought he was rather absent-minded; asked if I had heard from L lately. Told him about trip to Somerset then he remembered urgent business & set off. Bookdealer thinks Sir Vincent really is Athalia’s father. Bookdealer thinks Graf Haubenstein & his silent companion probably agents for some Italian prince or other. Wonder if they are right.

March 12th:

Met G today & we arranged to go shopping for trip for Somerset tomorrow. PG to accompany us as G still not allowed to go out alone. Asked G what her guardians are so afraid about but she does not know & apparently is not even curious.

March 14th:

G & PG came to pick me up for shopping yesterday. Think I bought too much but host is a baronet after all and also, Louisa’s weasel-faced husband will be with us so one really cannot have too many garments of delicate nature. PG reckons he saw an early copy of Woes of the Chaste Orphan Athalia IV & he claims that very first chapter contains Athalia’s marriage to her lost love, who he says no one else but the Merciless Pirate. Said that could not be; Merciless Pirate is Athalia’s lost twin Theodora. PG thinks the passage revealing the MP’s true identity intentionally misleading & Theodora died in the avalanche after all. Do so wish book would come out soon.

March 17th:

Think I should buy sturdy locks for my boxes before leaving; just in case Weaselface tries to break into them. Wonder where one buys them? Must ask the PG when he comes to visit next.

March 19th:

Had a note from G today saying she had caught cold & had been lying down the last few days. Poor girl, had a basket with cupcakes sent over directly. Wonder though why the PG did not come and let me know, also, must ask him about locks as am leaving in less than a week.

March 20th:

Went to visit poor G, still not quite recovered from her cold and feeling not at all well. Tried to cheer her up talking about various things but only partially successful. G had no idea where her PG was either; said she had only seen him once since she had fallen ill & only for very short then; thinks he must be doing some sort of military business. Had all but forgot about that but suppose she is right. Only do wish he would call as need to ask him about locks and where to acquire them.

Darcy walked me home afterwards but did not want to ask him; feared he would think me silly. D does not think the PG really saw an early copy of The Woes of the Chaste Orphan Athalia and agrees about Merciless Pirate being Theodora. Wonder though if maybe it is too obvious.

Promised to call on G again tomorrow & maybe will see the PG then. Have not seen Charles all week; wonder if I should worry?

March 21st:

Missing items have turned up!! Not all of them though but at at least my favourites. Was calling on Louisa today to confirm details for trip to Somerset & when I left housekeeper pressed parcel into my hand in the hallway & when I opened it at home found it to contain 2 unmentionables. Am sure now H had them all the time. Must try to talk to housekeeper soon.

Called on G then and helped her sort threads for her embroidery. Did not see the PG but at least G feeling better now.

Her Grace Caroline Fi Caroline Bingley, Duchess of London

March 22nd:

Saw the PG yesterday when visiting G and when he walked me home, told him about locks I wanted to buy. He said nothing but called again after tea and brought 2 sturdy locks and fixed them on my trunk. Was a bit embarrassed about letting him see my room but there was nothing private lying around & he did not stay long.

Really grateful for locks and spent most of today packing. Hope I will see Charles before I leave; want to say goodbye.

Thought about taking leave of Jane too but then thought it would be awkward as have not seen her for so long; really should have called sooner.

NB. Also should not neglect correspondence esp. now that am too be out of town.

Must write to:

Uncle Charles Bingley
Auntie Margaret & Mr Watson
Uncle Tiberius (bah)
Jane
Fanny Dashwood?
Georgiana
Charles
the PG

March 23rd, early morning:

What a night!! Louisa & H coming to pick me up in 2 hours but am not able to go to sleep anymore. Do not know where to begin – last night just as had finished packing & sent abigail away to iron gown for travelling, heard C finally coming home & telling his man to help him change quickly as he needed to leave again. In the heat of the moment decided to follow him to find out what he was up to so changed into the clothes the PG had given me and went after him. Regretted stupid idea almost as soon as I left house but could not give up then – only hope nobody saw me – so in much too tight waistcoat followed C into very dingy looking neighbourhood where he disappeared into some sort of public house.

Inside were dozens of shabbily dressed men with beards just like C; one of them was reading Byron in a booming voice & they all drank something which I later found out was absinthe, I think it is called. Did not want to be noticed so slipped into a seat in a corner & almost immediately was given a glass of absinthe (NB. Never accept offer of absinthe again, very vile!!) Then C stood up & began reciting long & very bad poem about a lonely swan that tries to kill itself & they all applauded wildly & congratulated him & gave him more absinthe.

Then the PG found me & things became a bit uncomfortable esp. because as he tried to drag me out of the place, some soldiers arrived to raid it.

Did not even have time to tell the PG he had no right to tell me where to go & where not because we had to run so fast through very shabby alleyways that all looked the same. Soldiers were still on our heels and already arresting 2 of the bearded gentlemen who had run with us & suddenly door opened and the PG pulled me into a house. Did not immediately realise what it was but the lady calling herself Madame Suzette very friendly & offered us tea and scones. Staid there for over an hour until the air was clear and was awfully lectured by the PG as if it was my fault that C kept visiting a poems’ den that was raided. Tried to ask the PG why exactly it was raided but he only blushed & would not say so Madame Suzette told me. Did not believe her at first but the PG blushed even more so realised she had to be right.

Do not think Am quite sure that Do wonder why

Can say have learnt some quite new so-called facts of life last night.

The PG walked me home shortly before dawn scolding me until I told him to tell me what right he had to interfere with my life.

Did not expect that answer either. Maybe should not have reciprocated but it did seem like a good idea at the time & the alleyway was very dark so nobody saw.

Luckily when I got home, C already fast asleep so soldiers did not catch him either.

Can only hope uncle Tiberius never finds out or he will send me to a convent.